I Had a Fishbone Stuck In My Throat For Days

This is a true story.

And also, let me preface, I’m what some call “woo-woo.” A proud woo-woo girly. There are some things I take as signs/alignments/however you want to label it. This was one of them for me. Here we go:

In 2022, I was working a retreat in Italy. Sounds glamorous. It wasn’t.

In fact, it was kind of the culmination of laaayered build-up in a lot of ways. Many of which I won’t get into, keeping that can of worms air-tight, in a cabinet, in a basement.

~🐠🐠🐠~

Sharing my opinions, standing up for myself, calling people on their shit, taking up space in certain settings was (and sometimes still is) a big challenge for me. ‘Twas also something that I didn’t want to think about, like a weakness.

So, this trip was one of those settings where I felt like:

boop boop beep boop

Something was in the air or the water or all of the above because the atmosphere and energy was so dense it was nearly tangible.

*Side note: I’m in the swing of my Saturn return during all of this.*

One night early on, we go out to this fancy dinner right on the water. The location was stunning. The food was…like 5 courses of explicitly fish lol. I like fish, but a little dibble dabble, not fish on fish on fish on fish.

After the third course or so, there was a dish that had the entire fish on it—head to tail. Again, not something I ever really go for but I thought ‘just try it, now would be the time to be a lil adventurous.’

I take my fork and get a small little piece. Before I knew it, as I was swallowing, I felt a sharp pain in my throat. Immediately I was like SHIT I JUST LODGED A TINY FISHBONE IN MY ESOPHAGUS.

What does one do in this situation???

I tried sipping water, bubbly, other food, nothing was dislodging that little bone splinter.

It wasn’t an emergency and I could still go on with the meal, so I sat there uncomfortably, trying to make the most of the rest of the evening.

The following 2-3 days (a lot of that trip is a blur tbh) I was going through the motions with this god-forsaken bone nestled in the middle of my jugular.

I tried it all: tablespoon of olive oil (awful), peanut butter and banana (not awful but not successful), drinking water upside down. None of the online suggestions were working. It was particularly annoying when I would turn my head because the bone would hit a certain angle that made it worse.

The retreat goes on, I’m trying not to turn my head all that much LOL, and it’s all around uncomf.

It slowly got better, not sure exactly when it became dislodged because it was gradual. By the end of the trip, all was well (with my bone issue, at least).

A couple coworkers/friends and I stayed an extra night in Milan before flying home. It wasn’t until this point when I put it together: this was a physical manifestation of one of my biggest internal challenges.

It was an emotionally-charged situation and my attention was almost explicitly on my throat, my voice. I simply could not escape it no matter how much I wanted to.

But then, it lead to me starting my own business and working for myself, exclusively, within a matter of a few months of all of this happening. Talk about taking the reins and speaking your truth!

Now, I think back on this fondly, as if there was no other way things should have unfolded. Through the incredibly uncomfortable, painful, harsh circumstances, I made extraordinary strides towards the best version of myself.

This isn’t to say speaking up is always easy now, by any means. But it sure as hell ain’t like what it used to be.

The fishbone saga is a crispy clear memory (and milestone) of transformation and growth.

Here’s to eating fish cautiously, preferably deboned, and taking ownership of your voice. 🥂🐠